Mario Kart 7 Being Patched; A Few Issues?
1. Is the patch included with new copies of Mario Kart 7?
Because it’s required to play online, so if it isn’t available by default, Nintendo have absolutely destroyed the long term value of the game.
You see, some people (okay, probably the majority) don’t really follow news that much. And a very significant portion of Nintendo’s userbase probably don’t even know about the eShop to begin with.
So picture this. Nintendo’s expanded audience finally buys a 3DS each and get Mario Kart 7 alongside it (given that the Wii Mario Kart game sold about 20 million copies, this is very likely to happen). They then decide like you do that they should start playing online…
And then up comes a message like ‘sorry, but you need the latest patch to play Mario Kart 7 online due to critical bugs, download it from the eShop’.
Why do I have this feeling Nintendo is going to be flooded with angry customers annoyed that they can’t play Mario Kart 7 online for the next two years?
People do not read instructions or manuals. They generally don’t go looking for information online the minute they buy the game either.
So if Nintendo doesn’t include the necessary patch on the game cartridge by default, they are going to be in the middle of a huge customer support nightmare for the next few months/years. You can almost see the hilarity that’ll occur when Nintendo is trying to explain the patching system to a really pissed off mother annoyed her son/daughter can’t play Mario Kart 7 online. Or how every Nintendo forum on the internet will end up filled with unlucky people asking why Mario Kart 7’s online features don’t work…
This update better damn be included on the game card by default for the next batch of Mario Kart 7 games.
2. Will it potentially break other aspects of the game?
This is one reason companies and individuals absolutely DREAD patching an already complete game. For every bug fixed, you end up with another one added. Take Wuhu Mountain Loop for instance.
Everyone hates this place, right?
It’s fairly obvious why the glitch exists, and in the most logically strict sense of the term it isn’t really a glitch. There are two areas, one at the beginning of part 2 and one at the end of it, and the end section passes generally by the starting section. So the water which drops you in the end of section 2 was originally meant to catch people who fell off the track near the end of the section.
So assuming Nintendo makes it so falling in the water/on the rock wall puts you back at the start of section 2, what happens if you fall off the near the end? Do you end up a whole lap behind everyone else? Because that’s what could easily happen if Nintendo takes the easy option in regards to fixing it.
What happens if you fall off here?
What if they just put a wall there to stop people reaching said area? Well that’s problematic because the glitch technically still exists. Gamers don’t like walls telling them where to go in video games, and I guarantee within a week someone will have found a way past any barricade Nintendo can put that spot. As a result, just adding a wall or barrier would just mean it’d take a little longer for someone to exploit their way through it. You’d need an infinite height invisible wall + fence for the entire length of the pond and cavern to really block anyone.
Note how easy it is to reach said area. A fence won’t work very well.
Final possibility is that they remake much of the checkpoint system, but that’s both extremely hard to do at short notice and would potentially break a lot of other tracks.
That’s hence one problem, how to fix the glitch in a way which doesn’t cause other glitches or get it used again in about a week when people figure out how to break your ‘fixes’.
3. Which bugs count as ‘unfair’?
Obviously Wuhu Mountain Loop is one of them, but what others? I see it being fairly likely they might also patch the one on Island Loop (the one near the lighthouse at the end) because of how common that’s becoming online, but those aren’t the only two exploitable bugs.
What of the Bowser Castle 1 glitch?
Or the DK Jungle glitch?
Or the Koopa Cape glitch?
If they only patch the Wuhu Island courses, I can easily see the Bowser Castle 1 being the most abused glitch online and that track being chosen near constantly. Pity it’s even worse in that only certain karts can do it.
If that turns out to be patched, then God help us, because the Koopa Cape shortcut might end up being the most overly abused glitch on wifi and the minimum skill level to play has pretty much shot up massively since it’s a really difficult glitch to pull off correctly.
Hopefully all the glitches get patched otherwise online just gets filled with people using different ones, and we could end up with a Bowser Castle 1 and Metal Mario only ‘standard’ like how we had nothing but Funky Kongs on Bowser Bikes in Mario Kart Wii.
However there is one bright side to all this…
It’ll be hilarious whenever Wuhu Mountain Loop comes up. Because you know people don’t pay much attention to what updates actually do and you know some luckyless moron will try the uber shortcut anyone. More fool them when they end up in dead last.
I can see a lot of annoyed Japanese users using Metal Mario now their precious shortcut isn’t in the game any more…
In conclusion, let’s hope Nintendo carries out this update correctly and doesn’t end up causing more problems than they fix.